Out of the Frying Pan: Critiquing the Critic!

by Melody Kettle


Everybody's a critic; food writers, restaurant reviewers, and dare I say, food bloggers. But what are they good for?

Here's another Out of the Frying Pan guest editorial from the Culinary Mercenary!

Like an elevator in a horror movie, our economy has once again plummeted just short of that ground floor saving use from a certain terrifying and tragic ending.  Our country is yet again being thrown into a state of panic and furthermore people are becoming sick and tired of being scared.  So, how you may ask, does this tie into the restaurant world?  Are we headed towards another three to five years of crappy “recession proof menus” or discounted tastings; Gross.  As if it’s not bad enough that we have to settle for the mediocrity that is currently disguised as food and are so easily led by false reviews and bias reviewers who regularly choose the “same ol’ thing”, for reasons unbeknownst to anyone; or is it?  Maybe it’s time we question where our “reviews” come from.  Who are these people leading the sheep to graze and why is it that only the “select” few are chosen time and time again to be spotlighted for mediocrity, question it.  Allow me to apologize to the almost 100 awesome restaurants in the state that never even get a second look by those reviewers because they can’t afford to advertise with your publication, or won’t offer you a free-bee.   I digress, I do not apologize for them, in fact I challenge them! 

                  Challenge:  What is the point of someone reviewing a restaurant (Chef) who obviously has less knowledge than said Chef?  That’s like allowing a sophomore in high school to do your taxes because they took a calculus class.  Maybe it’s time we put the reviewers under the microscope.


                  Who are you, where did you train and what is his/her  background?  My friends, shall we all stop heeding the flock and begin to make conscious decisions about food and restaurants that we like and enjoy patronizing rather than hanging on the obvious favoritism of others.   These “reviewers” have not only damaged their own accreditation over the years with neglect of the truly outstanding operations but have forgotten their place.  It is their job no their duty to help this industry not hurt it.  Yes, it is a critique and should touch on points of high and low, but it should not be damaging, get off your power trips and start writing more intellectual and respectful articles.   We are in a time of revolution on many fronts, we want quality not quantity.  The days of the three pound bowl of pasta are over, that to me is not a bargain or a deal, it is just disgusting.  I do not want to have to unbutton my pants or have a movement immediately following a meal.  Why do we confuse being stuffed to the point of purging with being satisfied?  We are educated consumers; do not allow artificial intelligence to sway the right of choice, it is a glorious privilege so exercise it regularly.  

 I believe we must analyze everything for ourselves.  The revolution, my friends, is near.